Tour Spiel

So a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away.....Oswald went on tour with Some Velvet Sidewalk. Several tours, actually, that took us across the country and back, but this particular tour was to LA. We started in Seattle and then hit Portland, Corvallis, San Francisco, and LA. We shared a van, equipment, and occasionally set lists. The first place we played in LA was Al's Bar, a creepy dark den of no-good where the bums on the street wanted us to pay them to "watch" our van. We played well, to no one, and was rewarded by the bar refusing to pay us because we "didn't bring anyone in". to our next gig at the infamous Raji's. Here we had to share a time slot with our compadres, each getting 15 whole minutes to tear up the stage. Here is an excerpt from a tour diary....
"LA's over! And none of us could be more joyful. We had a rough time -we played at Raji's, home of rock on Hollywood boulevard and it was SUCKFUL. We waited through 2 or 3 ridiculous glam bands until 1:30 am to play. All the driving, van fever, rage and disgust blew out as Don got a bit honest with the audience and told them 'Hollywood can blow my stool!'. Al accidentally slashed Martin's head open with his guitar and suddenly there was blood everywhere--a raccoon mask on Martin's face and stripes on his bass. Oswald was screaming! Martin didn't stop playing and we went wild. It was amazing. Afterwards the booking guy took me aside and said "hey, yeah Oswald can come back anytime, but those other guys are BANNED FOREVER!" We told him we were proud of those other guys.
Here's what Robert wrote about it all.....
"Saturday night: Gordo gets wasted on Mission. Eats his burrito off La Cumbre floor and drinks collected dip drippings. His roomates get tired of us stinking up their house. Martin sits on the pool table and is ready to tear a new asshole for the guys playing billiards whilst we play rock music. Diane breaks two bass strings and doesn't stop playing. I catch a wad of Croghan spit. The SF band stinks and the guy from Maximum Rock and Roll forgets his tape deck, then his paper, then his pen."
Those were the days, people. These are drawings of outfits I planned on taking with me on tour.


Milo said…
Don: "All right shut up. I've got a question...What's your favorite candy bar?"
Someone in the crowd: "Snickers"
Don: "YOU LIE!!!!" falls down
Anonymous said…
I remember driving through Northern California on our way back form this trip, very late at night,very tired and unwashed and Robert told this joke about the Queen and a horse and we all just lost it. It was much needed. I really miss him.