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"Suffering is part of our training program for becoming wise." -- Ram Daas

When I was ten years old I read the book "Born to Trot" by Marguerite Henry. It told the story of a boy named Gib who dreamed of racing horses, but had to spend a year in the hospital. As a child I thought how horrible it would be to be trapped inside for so long while life outside went on without you. To watch the sun rise and set through your windows, and to try not to go crazy.

Well, now I know first hand what it is like.

"IN-VALID". I hate that word. But it does apply to my back, hips, and legs. They are definitely invalid, right now. Perhaps forever. They don't work. I can't walk, my pelvis won't support my weak, shaking legs. I can hardly make it to the bathroom, and sometimes I can't. I tried my first pair of Depends the other day - at 50 years old. Humiliating. I felt like my grandmother in the old folks home. In fact, she was more mobile than I am right now. It's like I turned into a 105 years old overnight.

It's day 5 in this bed.…

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